INTERNET, USA — “This is America. I was told I can be anything when I grow up, and doesn’t ‘anything’ include an attendee at select screenings of Wonder Woman in one city in Texas?” tweeted activist Ben Reely (@womenaretheoppressive-gender) Thursday morning. He’s one of nearly dozens of protesters voicing their grievances about what he calls … Continue reading
Check out our trailer for DOIN’ IT, about trying to make it in Hollywood up from the bottom and — well, mostly staying there. Catch all 13 episodes of our web series here! DOIN’ IT is about two best friends who follow a piece of advice each episode about making it in showbiz, usually to … Continue reading
Instead of living through the last couple weeks of garbage smell in verbal form that all of our news feeds have become, try pretending that you are, instead, a graceful creature of the sky. Your news is birdsong and your desk is the trees. Your friends are birds too and your conversation is more birdsong. You … Continue reading
ST. LOUIS, MO – Prominent white supremacist Dan Donelan, whose faith in the superiority of white people shapes every facet of his life and behavior, may be reconsidering his beliefs based on local white teen Tyler – who is seemingly not growing up to be “supreme.” “We like to give ‘em a few years to … Continue reading
Written by Leah Folta & Lia Woodward The internet is in an uproar after this morning’s announcement that Warner Bros. greenlit an all-female reboot of beloved childhood Olsen twins favorite It Takes Two – re-ruining childhoods already devastated by the recent Ghostbusters movie. Much of the outrage centers around the idea that two memorable roles … Continue reading
ARCADIA, CA — A local teen struggling to make decisions about her future on Friday afternoon was visited by herself from the year 2028 and was pleased to find that she had plenty of time to acclimate to the situation. (As a minor, she remains anonymous.) “I wish the media would stop and think for … Continue reading
WASHINGTON, D.C. – At the First Annual Subnormal Temperature Hands Convention in the nation’s capital this month, organizers were surprised to discover that they also had an accidental OB/gyn convention on their cold, cold hands. The 693 speakers and attendees, enjoying panels and workshops such as “Discreet Blankets For Public Use,” “Wearing Mittens To Bed: … Continue reading
LOS ANGELES, CA – As the famous law of physics states, every ignorant public comment or piece of media released by a prominent figure has an equal and opposite reaction from the blogosphere. Unfortunately for physics, ignorant comment-saying and media creation requires much less energy than the necessary response to explain why it was degrading … Continue reading
WASHINGTON, D.C. – White House officials scrambled for answers this morning when news broke that the nation’s unemployment rate for Andrew Garfields has skyrocketed in recent months – to approximately 100%. “He’s so talented, he’s brilliant. There’s no reason. How did we let this happen?” A spokesperson for Garfield said in a live press conference … Continue reading
A midsize Los Angeles production company announced Tuesday that they are “expanding unpaid interns’ roles to increase their opportunities to learn,” according to their PR department, currently consisting of one intern. Most seem to enjoy the new arrangement. “I wasn’t sure how to feel when I started cleaning the bathrooms, but acting as CEO two … Continue reading
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