WASHINGTON, D.C. — Judge Brett Kavanaugh’s life was officially ruined in a private ceremony Saturday with his family, the president, key politicians, and the other 8 sitting supreme court justices in attendance. President Donald Trump bemoaned Kavanaugh’s ruined life to those present for the occasion before Chief Justice John Roberts and former Justice Anthony Kennedy … Continue reading
LOS ANGELES, CA – As the famous law of physics states, every ignorant public comment or piece of media released by a prominent figure has an equal and opposite reaction from the blogosphere. Unfortunately for physics, ignorant comment-saying and media creation requires much less energy than the necessary response to explain why it was degrading … Continue reading
LOS ANGELES, CA – In a turn of events yesterday evening, Melissa finally showed up at 7:24 with breathless reports of “traffic, like, everywhere.” “I think the rest of us saw the traffic coming, given that it was dinner and dinner typically happens right at the end of rush hour,” explained one witness, a friend … Continue reading
We’ve been hooking up with this guy for way too long. Click the “Moody Batman” link below to watch. Moody Batman Continue reading
Many assumed hating Lena Dunham would go out of style after the first couple seasons of her show, or at least be less exciting when Girls isn’t in season — and they couldn’t be more wrong! Here are 6 hot ways to let the world know her existence outrages and personally offends you. White hot! Her … Continue reading
After planning a brave takedown of Emma Watson’s feminazi propaganda about freeing men from their own gender stereotypes, certain members of 4chan’s /b/ board announced they’re targeting Dave’s mom next. “Women cry about unfair treatment, when Dave literally has to take out the trash?? Because his mom said so?”* posted one anonymous user about the … Continue reading
If one, hypothetically, had a car with no aux outlet or tape deck and found those thingies that connect your iPod to the radio to be prohibitively expensive, that person might have a lot of opinions/observations/rage about pop/rock/”alternative” radio. Below is a scientific collection and analysis of those cases. Continue reading
The Emmys’ Emmy nominations were on the TV today, and they are just baloney. Ech. Remember when Jonathan won those two Emmys?? I guess a broken clock’s right twice a lifetime. Ha! If those turkeys had a brain cell in their head, let me tell you what they would’ve done – BEST ACTOR – Jonathan … Continue reading
Abby Slenson, an online marketing consultant, announced to her friends over Sunday drinks that she’s “completely done” getting romantically involved with what she described as “any and all Steves. Never again.” Slenson’s decision to eschew any past, present, and future guys in her life named Steve was reached after what she calls “[her] consistent rotten … Continue reading
“So this was like the fourth sewer drain this week,” says local duckling rescuer (many times over) Anita Juarez. “And roof? How did they get onto a roof?” Disgruntled thoughts – shared by many citizens who are tired of getting ducklings out of and off of things around town. “Maybe we should just let them … Continue reading
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