OPINION – In this digital age of communicating with your co-workers predominantly through written electronic mail, it’s tough to walk the line between professional and so dry you sound rude. Some of us turn to a friendly “haha” to make it clear we’re not mad, and a pretty fun person – not knowing that it … Continue reading
LOS ANGELES, CA – In a turn of events yesterday evening, Melissa finally showed up at 7:24 with breathless reports of “traffic, like, everywhere.” “I think the rest of us saw the traffic coming, given that it was dinner and dinner typically happens right at the end of rush hour,” explained one witness, a friend … Continue reading
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In good news for fans of sustainability and bad news for anyone already having trouble keeping track of Hollywood’s white Chris population, President Obama announced Thursday that the future of renewable Chris-es is looking bright – and very blond. “Recent advances have been astounding, but I know we can do better,” the … Continue reading
Please look at Ted Cruz. Continue reading
But any success of Jen’s magnitude has enemies. One former friend feels snubbed by Jen’s success. “I got her this job. She was NEVER the funny one! Saying ‘hello, hello?’ into the phone when no one is there? I invented that. Jen is a thief and hack.” Continue reading
“There are a few easy things you can do to get pretty much any woman into bed,” Mike “SwitchBlaade” Ross began, taking the hands of his future wife at the altar of a little church in Eagle Rock, Los Angeles. Continue reading
Join Pinterest, or a well-trained mafia of women in embroidered vintage gloves and cute feather patterned hoods will hold you down in your sleep and force your eyes open as they sign you up against your will. And you better start goddamn pinning or the process will be repeated as the mafia pins some Mason-jar-themed … Continue reading
Before finding the Church of Scientology, Prepon was weighed down by typical struggling-actor problems, like previous negative emotions and the fact that the eyelashes glued onto her face can’t move because she is a plank of wood with no muscle tissue and also technically dead. Continue reading
Many assumed hating Lena Dunham would go out of style after the first couple seasons of her show, or at least be less exciting when Girls isn’t in season — and they couldn’t be more wrong! Here are 6 hot ways to let the world know her existence outrages and personally offends you. White hot! Her … Continue reading
Human interaction, sunsets, and everything you’ve fought so hard for has failed to make you happy. Why not give one of these great brunch spots a shot? Annabelle’s If you’re lacking a sense of purpose, see if you’ll find it in the famous French toast at Annabelle’s. Spring for their indulgent extra toppings, since you’re … Continue reading
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