Experts have found that a simple trick will improve the taste and texture of your booty the next time you serve your guests (or just yourself!). Rest your booty for ten minutes before serving, or all of the care and effort you put into preparation may result in a booty that’s tougher and chewier than … Continue reading
Modern understanding of gender and sexuality has led to so many exciting discussions and nuances. Since more people now realize that gender is a Spectrum, if you act now you can bundle a home telephone line with your identity. Since gender is separate from sexuality, this does not preclude you from getting lightning fast internet … Continue reading
Written by Leah Folta & Lia Woodward The internet is in an uproar after this morning’s announcement that Warner Bros. greenlit an all-female reboot of beloved childhood Olsen twins favorite It Takes Two – re-ruining childhoods already devastated by the recent Ghostbusters movie. Much of the outrage centers around the idea that two memorable roles … Continue reading
WASHINGTON, D.C. – At the First Annual Subnormal Temperature Hands Convention in the nation’s capital this month, organizers were surprised to discover that they also had an accidental OB/gyn convention on their cold, cold hands. The 693 speakers and attendees, enjoying panels and workshops such as “Discreet Blankets For Public Use,” “Wearing Mittens To Bed: … Continue reading
LOS ANGELES, CA – As the famous law of physics states, every ignorant public comment or piece of media released by a prominent figure has an equal and opposite reaction from the blogosphere. Unfortunately for physics, ignorant comment-saying and media creation requires much less energy than the necessary response to explain why it was degrading … Continue reading
PASADENA, CA – The upcoming Gilmore Girls Netflix revival has aroused excitement in hordes of internet fans, but for one woman the arousal is literal – and not as fun as it sounds. “It’s ruined my life, honestly, and I’m sick of hiding it,” Tasha Perkins, 41, revealed about her newfound affliction. “I can only, … Continue reading
WASHINGTON, D.C. – White House officials scrambled for answers this morning when news broke that the nation’s unemployment rate for Andrew Garfields has skyrocketed in recent months – to approximately 100%. “He’s so talented, he’s brilliant. There’s no reason. How did we let this happen?” A spokesperson for Garfield said in a live press conference … Continue reading
LOS ANGELES, CA – In a turn of events yesterday evening, Melissa finally showed up at 7:24 with breathless reports of “traffic, like, everywhere.” “I think the rest of us saw the traffic coming, given that it was dinner and dinner typically happens right at the end of rush hour,” explained one witness, a friend … Continue reading
We’ve been hooking up with this guy for way too long. Click the “Moody Batman” link below to watch. Moody Batman Continue reading
Here are 5 stars that never could have guessed you were gay! 1) Ian McKellan Famed actor Sir Ian McKellan gave a wise, knowing nod at the news that you are gay, always have been, always will be, and have no reason to hide, before responding, “I’ve known for years that Anderson Cooper was gay, … Continue reading
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