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8 Fresh Role Playing Scenarios You Probably Haven’t Tried Yet

Millions of readers have been begging for alternatives to the tired old Nurse-Patient dynamic (yawn!), and we have heard your freaky plea.

Yawn!

Yawn!

After a little bit of brainstorming, here are eight real life-inspired roles complete with helpful dialogue suggestions to get you into character on your spicy nighttime funtivities.

1) Dermatologist and Patient

Suggested Dialogue:

Dermatologist: Can you tell me who your primary care physician is?

Patient: Yeah, uh, you know I have a hard time pronouncing it, but I wrote it on the form-

Dermatologist: Oh yes that’s fine. So you’re here about a mole, huh?

Patient: Yup, it’s right here on my neck, see? It’s probably nothing…

Dermatologist: Always good to get checked out. Do you have any history of other skin conditions? I’ll be back in a few minutes, but I’m going to have you take your shirt off for me.

2) Green Peace Recruiter and Meek Pedestrian

Green Peace Recruiter: Hey can I talk to you for a second about the orangutans and how their homes are being destroyed?

Meek Pedestrian: Orangutans?

Green Peace Recruiter: Yeah look at these heartbreaking pictures of them fleeing! You have the power to help if you just sign this donation list here-

Meek Pedestrian: Ehh I’m kind of on my way to something…?

Green Peace Recruiter: I totally get that, this’ll just take a few minutes.

Meek Pedestrian: Okay fine.

Green Peace Recruiter: Awesome, the rainforest thanks you! First things first, do you care if I leave my socks on during?

3) Sports Arena Snack Vendor and Fan

Suggested Dialogue:

Sports Arena Snack Vendor: Peanuts! Lemonade! Dibs ice cream!

Fan: Hey I’ll take some of those Dibs!

Snack Vendor: Yes Ma’am! That’ll be five dollars… and your undergarments.

4) Customer Service Robot and Caller With A Problem

Suggested Dialogue:

Customer Service Robot: Hello. Please clearly state your question.

Caller: Changed account password doesn’t work.

Customer Service Robot: I’m sorry, I cannot understand your question. Please try again.

Caller: Changed. Account. Password. Does. Not. Work.

Customer Service Robot: For password assistance, please press one.

Caller: Ugh.

Customer Service Robot. I’m sorry, I cannot understand that question. Please try again.

Caller: What are you wearing?

5)  Film Director and 1st AD

Suggested Dialogue:

AD: Hey listen, we seriously need to hurry this up-

Director: I know, I know.

AD: I’m not kidding, we need to move fast, we were supposed to break for lunch like, hours ago.

Director: This’ll just be five more minutes!

AD: You get TWO!

Director: Oh yeah?

AD: Yeah! Oh god, Yeah!

6) Neighborhood Watch and Suspicious Character

Suggested Dialogue:

Neighborhood Watch: Where are you off to at this hour?

Suspicious Character: Oh… you know.

Neighborhood Watch: No, I don’t. I’m gonna have to ask you to leave– are those drugs in your mouth?!

Suspicious Character: YOU CAN’T CATCH MEEEE!

Neighborhood Watch: I’m calling the police! After we do a bunch of consensual stuff!

7) Alex Trebek and Jeopardy Contestant

Suggested Dialogue:

Jeopardy Contestant: Toys for 500 please.

Alex Trebek: A caveman-themed game in which “rocks” were thrown at other players led to the creation of this product in 1969.

Jeopardy Contestant: What is Nerf?

Alex Trebek: You got it.

Jeopardy Contestant: Things I’m Going To Do To You for 800.

Alex Trebek: And that’s today’s Daily Double!

Jeopardy Contestant: I’ll wager… 2,000.

Alex Trebek: This pivotal scene in the film Atonement, starring Keira Knightley and James Mccavoy.

Jeopardy Contestant: What is… watch me strip down and jump into a fountain?

Alex Trebek(superior smile): Sorry, but the correct answer is ‘Passionately do you against a wall of books in the library!’

8) Internet Blogger and Troll In The Comments

Suggested Dialogue:

Blogger: I really enjoy drinking hot chocolate and spending time around puppies, but who doesn’t? That’s all for today.

Troll: I doesn’t. I hate them. I hate all those things.

Blogger: What why??

Troll: This blog is stupid I don’t know why I even read it it’s the dumbest thing I’ve seen on the internet all day I’m gonna tell all of my friends never to read this blog go crawl in a hole you probably look like a turtle when you wear shorts.

Blogger: You’re an awful person.

Troll: THIS IS ALL OBAMA’S FAULT.

Blogger: ….

Troll: THIS IS ABOUT TO GET SEXY NOW!!!! leahandlia logo

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