Get Juicier Booty by Resting Ten Minutes Before Serving
Advice / Food / Get More Sex / Health / science / Self Help / Women and Men

Get Juicier Booty by Resting Ten Minutes Before Serving

Experts have found that a simple trick will improve the taste and texture of your booty the next time you serve your guests (or just yourself!). Rest your booty for ten minutes before serving, or all of the care and effort you put into preparation may result in a booty that’s tougher and chewier than … Continue reading

Gender is a Spectrum, and Sexuality is a Verizon Fios
Get More Sex / Health / Inspirational / Natural Phenomena / Politics / science / Self Help / Women and Men

Gender is a Spectrum, and Sexuality is a Verizon Fios

Modern understanding of gender and sexuality has led to so many exciting discussions and nuances. Since more people now realize that gender is a Spectrum, if you act now you can bundle a home telephone line with your identity. Since gender is separate from sexuality, this does not preclude you from getting lightning fast internet … Continue reading

CDC Does Not Recommend Sucking On Partner’s Outstretched Tongue, “It’s just too weird.”
Health / Politics / science

CDC Does Not Recommend Sucking On Partner’s Outstretched Tongue, “It’s just too weird.”

After promises from the highly criticized agency to be “less slow to take action,” the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention released new guidance Friday saying it does not recommend sucking on a partner’s outstretched tongue on account of being, “just too weird.” “It’s just a really, really bizarre sensation for both parties. We … Continue reading

OPINION: I’m Writing In to Denounce The NYT Op-Ed Anomous…Anomously
In The News / OPINION / Politics

OPINION: I’m Writing In to Denounce The NYT Op-Ed Anomous…Anomously

By now we’ve all seen– you’ve all seen it, haven’t you, the Op-ed? Yes. You’ve all seen it in the Failing New York Times. The Op-Ed was of course anomous…anomousss,  but listen folks, two can play that game! So I’m writing in to say what gutless, disgusting–they are gutless to do this against the great … Continue reading

How To Make The Most Of Your Time Alone With Your Uterus Before Kavanaugh’s Confirmation
Adulthood Struggles / Advice / Babies / Health / In The News / Lists / Politics / The Man / Women and Men

How To Make The Most Of Your Time Alone With Your Uterus Before Kavanaugh’s Confirmation

Kamala is doing her best and public opinion isn’t currently glowing, but the political pressure on Republicans and legislatively hilariously easy path for Brett Kavanaugh makes his placement on the Supreme Court currently seem inevitable. So here are some fun date ideas to make the most of your remaining alone time with your uterus! Have … Continue reading

Scientific Community: “Love already 90% dead due to human activity.”
Celebrities / Grief Counseling / In The News / Women and Men

Scientific Community: “Love already 90% dead due to human activity.”

HOLLYWOOD, California – Years of speculation and debate officially came to an end Monday as the scientific community announced it had reached a consensus: Love is already 90% dead, indisputably due to human activity. Experts were aware Love had been dying with increasing speed over the last decade, but  the idea that humans, especially famous … Continue reading

Mitch McConnell Emerges From Shell With Massive Cut To Medicaid, Tax Cut For Rich
Business News / In The News / Politics / The Man

Mitch McConnell Emerges From Shell With Massive Cut To Medicaid, Tax Cut For Rich

WASHINGTON, D.C. — After weeks of writing the much-anticipated Senate version of the House’s recent health care bill alone in his shell, McConnell’s work has been met with an uproar. “It was very hard to reach him. The bottom part of his shell folds up slightly to create a seal with the top part,” Rep. … Continue reading

10 Decorative Fall Gourds That Look More Like My Boobs Than Anything On HBO
Food / Movies/TV / Natural Phenomena / OPINION / Pictures / The Man / Women and Men

10 Decorative Fall Gourds That Look More Like My Boobs Than Anything On HBO

Maybe you think these fall gourds are weird looking, but I promise you wouldn’t think that if HBO would cast a wider variety of topless women. 1 Even these normal-looking little pumpkins probably make you feel a little weird when I say they look like my breasts – why? Is that the world we really want … Continue reading

5 Birds To Fantasize About Living As For The Rest Of Election Season
Grief Counseling / In The News / Inspirational / Pictures / Politics / Self Help / The Man / Women and Men

5 Birds To Fantasize About Living As For The Rest Of Election Season

Instead of living through the last couple weeks of garbage smell in verbal form that all of our news feeds have become, try pretending that you are, instead, a graceful creature of the sky. Your news is birdsong and your desk is the trees. Your friends are birds too and your conversation is more birdsong. You … Continue reading